can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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