school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize