But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
