I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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