that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
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