why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Yo dont text me then not text me
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
