He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
