As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
