Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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