Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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