Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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