Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
