My room smells like vodka and shame
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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