I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
