so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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