i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
