Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
