she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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