Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
