May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
