That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
