she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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