Sorry, I don't speak sober.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
