He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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