This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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