Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
