put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
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