He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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