Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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