You're completely useless in the revolution.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
