I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
