its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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