if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize