Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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