Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
