I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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