Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
