you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize