My brain says no but my pants say off.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
