google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
