Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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