People with herpes should wear stickers.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
