all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Man, jail baloney is awful.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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