I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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