i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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