I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
