Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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