he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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