A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
she smelled like a LAN party
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
