end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
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