He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Rumble strips road head = magical
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
